Friday, October 10, 2008
Tired and hurt.Tats wad i'm feeling rite now.Maybe its those nights that i have been unable to sleep and crying the whole time and ended up going to the hospital.But that's all behind me.Just sad that she has been bad-mouthing about me to her classmates and family members saying that i have always been violent towards her.How do i know this? Simple,her classmates told me and asked if its true as they have nvr seen us fighting and they know i'm not the kind of guy that touches a girl.I simply told them the truth and provided evidence that i have not laid a finger on her to hurt her.And they asked me,"Wad about the throwing chair incident?" called up qayyum and qayyum told them the truth.I didnt threw the chair at her.Qayyum is also her classmate he was also present when the incident happened in case u guys are wondering.After hearing from both sides,hasib,amal,haikal,ezul and the rest that was there yesterday are able to know who is right and who is wrong.And hasib confirmed it even more when he called his friend Dan to come down yesterday and hear his stories about her and i told hasib the stories i was told by my friends about her.Thinking about the past,i started to question myself.Did i do the right thing to give her another chance when she kissed the French guy behind my back? I think i didnt as love is soo strong,i thought it will overcome all.I guess i was blinded by love.I thought that she was different,but in the end it just proves my theories.All girls are the same.*SIGH*Wad a fool i have been.Gave her all my trust,time and respect and she spits it at me.I have never contacted other girls and have always been faithful to her.Guess this is life.Cruel.A big word i know but that's how life is.Yes,i agree.Money does makes the world go round.But can u be happy?No,it can't buy anyone's happiness.I agreed i have not showered u with money and all the nice things in life.It's because i dun think it's important.But i managed however to save up close to $700 to shower her with the nice things in life which i was planning to do so on our 10th month anniversary,but that's not gonna happen.So i put the money to good use.Gave hasib $130 for the phone and the rest? Well,bought myself drinks.To think i sacrificed my own pocket money and not eating during school time just to give it to her as her family is facing financial crisis at that point of time.It was not easy as my family is also facing financial problems."Why did i do those things?" I questioned myself.All that came up was"LOVE".All this time i have been fooled.I won't deny the fact that i still love her,missed the times we spent together.Too much time infact as now i won't be able to see my daughter cause i was always not at home and was always out with her and my parent's decided not to take my daughter home anymore.Sacrificed my daughter just to be with her and this is what i get in return. I'm gonna stop about these things and start blogging.
Okay,went out at about 12p.m yesterday and met up with hasib,amal,ezul,syahiran and haikal at kembangan to play Dota.Reached at about 12:30p.m and started playing.Was hard to get comfortable as she has always been by my side and seeing the seat next to me is empty was heartbreaking.I tried not to show it to them and carried on playing.Was hard at first as it was a long time playing but got better as the game progressed.Haikal and syahiran has improved tremendously! They are getting very very good at it.Hasib,haikal and syahiran left early as they had a class to attend to but will be comming back.Me,amal and ezul carried on playing while waiting for them.They arrived abit later than expected and we started playing again.After playing the game,we went outside to a coffeeshop had a drink and left for tampines as Hasib and haikal wanted to study.I tagged along and called Khairul to meet up with us.Seeing them study reminded me of the things that me and her used to do.Study at the void deck.Tried to hide it but it became all too obvious and that's when Hasib talked to me about the situation.We talked and talked till it was way past hasib's time to go off and now he misses his bus.He called his friend Dan to come down and fetch him and when Dan reached,stories of her unfolds.Dan and hasib wanted to tell me about yani's history when they found out me and her were together in january and didnt as they were scared i would take it the wrong way.Now,i'm facing the consequences.Went off at about 2a.m and reached home at about 3 a.m.Had a good day but feelings spoiled most of it.
Missing my baby bushuk
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